Tales Told

1st typescript, September 1926 and January 1928, II.2§8 draft level 3, 3+

MS Cornell 1-11; missing Draft details

A great dab was frankily at the manual arith sure enough which was the bekase he knowed from his cradle no boy better why his ten fingures were giving him whatfor to fife with. First there came boko and nigh him wigworms
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and nigh him tittlies and nigh him cheekchaps and nigh him pickpocket with pickpocketpumb, pickpocketpoint, pickpocketprod, pickpocketpromise and upwithem. And anyhows always after them the dimpler he weighed the fonder fell he of cardinals. Always would he be areciting of them up by rota, from fursed to laced, quickmarch to decemver, so as to pin the tenners, thumbs down. And anon and aldays, strues yerthere, would he wile arecreating em in lumerous ways like to pitch of your cap, pac, on to tin tall spillicans. Ace, deuce, tricks, quarts, quims. While on the other hand, sexes, suppers, oglers, novels and dice. What signifieth all that but 'tis as strange to relate he, nonparile to reed, rite and reckan, caught allmeals dull marks for his nucleud and allgobrew. O them bate him up jerrybly! Binomeans to be comprendered. The aximones. Equal to = hsaoc.


So, as you know yourself better nor anyone else, comic cuts always were to be seen in Casey's, frost book of, page torn on dirty, and so, by long last, as it would fall out, must he to bid adieu to those cardinhands he so greatly missed. Dear hearts of my counting, would it lilt then, forewheel to backnumbers, and, the time being no help fort, please lick one and turn over.

Problem ye ferst, construct ann aquilittoral dryankle. Probe loom! With his primal handstoe in his sole salivarium. Concoct an equoangular trilitter. On the name of the teaser and off the tongs and off the mythametical tripods. Beatsoon.

Can you not do her, numb? asks Dolph, suspecting the answer know. I cont, ken you, ninny? asks Kev, expecting the answer guess. Nor was the noer long disappointed for, easiest of kisshams, he was told. O, tell it to we, do, Sem! Well, 'tis thusly. First mull a mugfull of mud, son. Oglores,
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he prays, olorum! What the D.V. would I do that for? That's a goosey's ganswer you're giving me, he is told, what the Deva would you do that for? Take your mut for a first beginning. Anny liffle mud which cometh out of Mam will doob, I guess. Mux it at a point of the
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coastmap to be called α but pronounced olfa. There's the isle of Mun, ah! O! Bene! Now, all in applepine order, (for Dolph, dean of |3idles idlersº3|, suckling of a stone, |3though barekely a boy, he tooº3|venite praeteriti, sine mora dumque de entibus nascituris decentius in lingua romana mortuorum parva chartula liviana ostenditur, sedentes in laetitia super ollas carnium, spectantes immo situm lutetiae unde auspiciis secundis tantae consurgent humanae stirpes, antiquissimam flaminum amborum Jordani et Jambaptistae mentibus revolvamus sapientiam: totum tute fluvii modo mundo fluere, eadem quae ex aggere fututa fuere iterum intra alveum fore futura, quodlibet sese ipsum per aliudpiam agnoscere contrarium, omnem demum amnem ripis rivalibus amplecti — recurrently often coached ribolliumtending mikes of his same and over his own choirage, among of whom he was pulled up,
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for a dillon a dollar, changing letters for them to bronze mottes and blending tschemes for em in tropadores and devising tingling tailwords too whilest, cunctant that another would finish his sentence for him, he would smilabit eggways ned, he would, and pick upon his ten ordinailed ungles, retelling humself a reel of funnish ficts apout the shee, how faust of all and on segund thoughts and the third's the charmhim girlalove and fourthermore and filthily with bag from Oxatown and baroccidents and proper accidence and hoptohill and hexenshoes; and in point of feet when he landed in ourland's leinster for the twicedhecame time off Lipton's launch in a |3black suit tan soute3| of sails he converted its natives, young ordnands and old unguished elders, to put off the barcelonas from their sinful corpicules and
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kiss on their boots |3(Master!)3| as often as they came within bloodshot of |3another that other3| familiar temple and showed em the celestine way to by his tristar and |3his flop3| hattrick and his humdrum dumb and numb nostrums that he larned in Hymbuktu; and that same gallo-roman cultous is very prevailend up to this windiest of soirées all over what was beforeabouts a land of nods, in spite of all the bloot, all the braim, all the brawm, all the brile, that was shod, that were shat, that was shuk all the while, for our people still hold
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to their healing and byleave in the old weighs downupon the Swanny innovated by him, the prince di Propagandi, the chrism for the christmass and the rock o' ralereality, and it is veritably belied, we belove, that not all the soupcans that's in the queen's pottagepots and not all the green gold that the Indus contains would ever hinduce them (o.p.) to steeplechange back to their ancient habits which, cumma, having listed curefully to his continental's curses, apostrophised Byrne's and Flaming's and Furniss's and Bill Hayses's and Ellishly Haught's, hoo, they let drop as a doombody drops without another word eitherways, as swift as paddywhack, coal on: and, talking of missions in general, of course this has blameall in |3this that3| world to say to his private's jidgments when, so to put it, on the shaughraun; but to return for a mere moment to the first landing (half a mot), if the pretty elisabess — she laid her |3sleeve batsleeveº3| for him two trueveres |3say tell3|, and beauty alone of all dares say where now is shee that was the belle of La Chapelle, shapely Liselle, and the peg-of-my-heart of all the tompull, or on whose limbs-to-lave her semicupiose eyes now kindling themselves are brightning, the Shee who then (4.32 m.p. to be precise, accordant to all three doctors' waterburies, that was MacAuliffe and poor MacBeth and poor old MacCamell, to the tickleticks, of the synchronisms, all lauschening, a time also confirmed seven sincuries later by the fourth medical johnny, poor old MacAdoo MacDollett, with notary, whose presence was required by the law) who gave him |3then3| that vantage of a cuddlebath at her proper mitts — if she then, the then that matters — but, seigneur!, she could never have forefelt such a coolcold douche as him doubling back, O alors!, to mount miss under a vartryproof name (would it wash?), with a cheek as peaceful as, shall we say, a pretty professed claire's, to buy her in, mon foie, |3nunc nunc3| and |3tunc tunc3|, and other mavourneens in plurible numbers from Arklow shore to Louth, come messes, come mams, and touch your spottprice (for 'twas he was the born suborner, man), on behalf of an oldest ablished firma of winebakers, Lagrima und Gemiti, later on called by the unirish name Grindings and Nash, the
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One and |3Only Firm, Only,º3| lastly of |3Saint Yves by3| Landsend corner, man — it must have been, faw!, a terrible mavrue mavrone, such a finalley, as flat as his fut, for whowhowho?, the poour girl, a lonely peggy, given the bird, so isoladed and short wonder so manny of the tomthick and tarry members in all there
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sobsequious ages upped to console with her till the ides of Manx, the O'Kneels and the O'Prayins and the O'Hyens and the O'Hollerins, |3hollyboysº all,3| in juwelietry and kickyochoses and madornaments and that's not the finis of it (would it were!) — but to think of him founding a nelliza the second also clipt buss where he did and when he did, retriever to the last — forget now was it on street or down — for merry a valsehood whisprit he to minny a lilying earling; and to try to analyse that ambo's pair of braceleans akwart the sea trying to amarm all of that bearded but insensible virility into her limited lap at the same slap for towelling ends in their delightful Sessex home, Somehow-at-Sea, as though he were a wrigular writher neonovene babe! — well, diarmuee and
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granyu, if that is what lamoor that of gentle breast rathe is intaken seems circling towards out yondest heaven holp his hindmost and, mark me, it |3egins agins3| to pear like it par my fay and there is no use for your pastripreaching for to cheese it either or praying fleshblood claspers to take warnung by the trispast, why?, bycows they wonot do ut; and an you could peep inside the cerebralised saucepan of this our goodfornobody you would see in his house of thoughtsam what a jetsam litterage of
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convolvuli of times lost or strayed, of lands derelict or sunk and of tongues laggin too, and not only that but, by searchlighting pharahead into faturity, your own convolvulis would real to jazzfancy the fresh takingplace of what stale words whilom were woven with and fitted fairly featly for; so; and equally so the crame of it is that whenas the |3swiftshot swiftshutº3| soareyes of our pupilteachertaut duplex will hark back to lark to you that no mouth has the might to set a mearbound to the march of a landsmaul in half a sylb onward the beast of boredom common sense lurking down inside his loose Eating collar is |3going gogoing3| to whisht to you sternly |3that how3|) you must, haw, draw the line somewhawre.
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Whats? Your parn! (And in truth he had albut lost himself, so had he gazed in the lazily eye of his lapis, Vieus Von DVbLIn) Given now an inch you take an all. Now (lens
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your dappled eye here), we see the copyink line AL stops at Lambday. Modder ilond there too. Now with Olaf as centrum and Olaf's lambtail for his spokesman circumscribe a cyclone. Hoop! O, dear me! O, dear me now! So clever, early doomed, alas! But it's not alover yet. The mystery repeats itself todate as our mothar Gaudyanna, that was daughter to a tanner, used to sing hesterday and istherday and forivor. I remumble, purr lil |3murr of mine murrer ofº myhind3|, so she used indeed. |3|aDear Faithfula| departed.º Restº in peace!3| What a wonderful memory you have too! Twonderful morrowy! Bene! Now springing quickenly
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from the mudland Loosh from Luccan with Allhim as her Elder turn a somersault. Watch! Hop lala! O, dear me, that was very nesse! Very nace indeed! Bene! Now, there's tew tricklesome poinds where our twain of doubling bicirculars dunloop into eath the ocher. Lucihere! I fee where you
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mea. Now, I think as I'm squeezing the limon I'd likelong to mack a capital Pee for Pride down there and let you go and orrange your modest mock Pie out of Humbles up your end. Are you right there, Michael, are you right? Ay, I'm right here, Nickel, and I'll write. But it's the muddest thick that was ever heard dump. Now join alfa |3pee pea3| and |3pee pea3| loose by dotties and eelpie and paleale by trunkles. Like pat. I pea. Now, aqua in buccat, I'll make you to see figuratleavely the whom of your eternal
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geomater. Pist! We carefully, if you please, lift up by her hem the maidsapron of our A.L.P., fearfully!, till its nether nadir is where its naval's napex will have to beandbe. Waaaaaa. Tch! Pla! And there midden of the stream's your muddy old delta for you now, the first of all usquiluteral triangons and Allaph Quaran's bed or end.
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O, dear me, look at that now! What a quincidence! But you're gaping up the wrong palce, you blessed |3simpletop. simpletopº!º3| You must lap down the bluishing reflection below. This. Well, well, well, well, well! O Dee, O Dee, that's very lovely! Very lively entirely! You know, you were alwise one of the bright ones, fakes. You know, you're the devil's own smart gossoon, so you are, hoax! You know, you'll be damned, so you will, but you will be, carrotty.

Whereapool with a sweet me ah err eye ear marie to reat from the jacob's and a slypull at the slidepage would candydissing P. Kevin wont to nibble his mum to me in bewonderment of his chipper chuthor grafficking cyclopes after trigamies pursuiting theirselves and godolphing in fairlove to see around the waste of noland's browne jesus (give him no quartos!) till that on him so poorin sweat the juggaleer's veins (quench his quill!) in his scrag stud out bursthright tamquam
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taughtropes. From this misbelieving facemaker to his noncredible fancyflame. Ask for Bosthoon, late for Mass, pray for the blaablaablack sheep. (Sure, you could rite as foyne as that yerself, mick!) Dear and he went on to scripple gentlemine born, milady bread, he would pen for her, he would pine for her, how he would patpun fun for all with his frolicky frowner so and his glumsome grinner otherso. And how are you, waggy? My animal is sorrafool! And trieste, ah trieste ate I my liver! Se non è vero son trovatore. O jerry! He was soso. He was sadfellow. He was mistermysterion. Look at his twitchers! He was quisquis, floored on his plankraft of shittim wood. Look at him! Want more ashes? Now he was lying low on his rawside laying siege to goblin castle. And now he was laying him long on his laughside lying sack to croakpartridge. Ann opes too soon ear. If you could me lendtill the price of a plate of poultice. With best apolojigs to self for the clericals and again trispassing on your bunificence. Well, wiggywiggywagtail, and how are you, yaggy? Blott.
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Now (brush your |3flop saton3| hat, son of a Butt! She's mine sweet tart of Whiteknees Archway) watch him signing away in happynest complete. Intricatedly in years, jirryalimpaloop. And |3I romain i Romainº3| to fallthere at bare feet, hurryaswormarose. Hp u bn gd grl. Und alws my thts. To be continued. Anon.

And ook, ook, fanky! This is how San Holypolypools.
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And this is the way Romeopullupaleaps. Pose the pen, man, way me does. Way Ole Missa Yellatruth fust show me how. And this, regard!, is how Chawleses Skewered |3'Paruppernelligoes paraparnelligoesº3'|.

But (that Jacoby feeling again! and Kevvy just loves his puppadums!) after all his meddlied muddlingisms, thee faroots hof cullchaw end ate citrawn, woodint wun able rep of the triperforator awlrite through his pergaman do for the selfchuruls smarter like it done for manny another of the hairydary quite quandary firstlings could not but reckon in his adder's way our frankson who, to be plain, was misocain. Wince
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wan's won! Rip! And his countinghands rose.