— How good you are! But could you, of course, decent Lettrechaun (to change your name if not your nation), we knew, while still in the barrel, read the strangewrote anaglyptics of those Shemletters patent for His Christian's Em?

— Greek! Shaun replied, pointing to the cinnamon quill behind his acoustrolobe. Look at that for a ridingpin! I am, by St Larynx, letterpotent to play the ^|8same sem^8| backwards like ^|8anything Oscan wild ^|aor unshent Persse or from the Ottoman or offº the Topticº^a|8| off the types
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of my finklers in the draught or with bottles, with my ops thickshut and all. But it is horrebrew bad on the corns and callouses. As far as that goes I associate myself with your remark just now ^|8from theodicy^8| re furloined notepaper and quite agree in your prescriptions for indeed I am, pay Gay, in juxtaposition to say it is not a nice production. It is a pinch of scribble. Overdrawn! ^|8Besides,º it'sº auctionable, all about crime and libel!^8| Nothing beyond clerical horrors et omnibus to be entered for the foreign as secondclass matter.
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Flummery is what I would call it if you were to ask me to put it on a single dimension what pronounced opinion I might possibly have about them bagses of trash which the mother and Mr Unmentionable has reduced to writing without making news out of my sootyname. An infant sailing eggshells on the floor of a wet day would have more sabby.

Letter, carried of Shaun, son of Hek, written of Shem, brother of Shaun, for Alp, mother of Shem, for Hek, father of Shaun.

— Kind Shaun, we all requested, much as we hate to say it but since you rose to the use of money have you not, without suggesting for an instant, millions of ^|8ways moods^8| used up slanguage ^|8ten ton^8| times as ^|8worse words^8| as the penmarks used out ^|8in sinscript^8| with such hesitancy by your cerebrated brother — excuse me not mentioningahem?

— CelebrAted! Shaun replied ^|8'in the under the sheltar of his^8'| broguish, vigorously rubbing his magic lantern to a glow of fullconsciousness. ^|8''HesitEncy HeCitEncyº^8''|! Notorious I rather would feel inclined to myself in the first place to describe Mr O'Shem the Draper as should I be ^|8accentually^8| called upon to pass my opinions into impulsory ^|8''irelit irelitz^8''|. But I would not care to be so insulting to my own part as to swear for the moment positively as to the views of ^|8'Denmark Denmark.º No, sah! but But^8'| let me say my every belief before my high Gee is that I much doubt of it. ^|8'As I learn he is on his last,º boasting always of his ruddy complexious!^8'| She, the ^|8'mother mammyfarº^8'|, was put up to it by him, the iniquity, that ought to be placed in irons into some drapery institution off the antipopees for wordsharping only if he ^|8|~would call in the chemist and^~|8| could pass the panel doctors. For that is well celibated before the four divorce courts and all the King's ^|8''wenches paunches^8''| how he has ^|8the solitary from^{8| |8}seen seeing Scotch^8| snakes and has consumption ^|8and dalickeycyphalosº^8| on his ^|8brach^8| premises where he can be thinking himself to death. Rot him! Flannelfeet! ^|8|aFlattyre! Flattyro!^a| I will describe you in a word.^8| Homo! Then putting his bedfellow on me! ^|8'I'll give it to him for
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that!^8'| Is he on whosekeeping or are my? With his unique hornbook and his prince of the apauper's pride, blundering all over the two worlds! If he waits till I buy him a musselman's present! He's ^|8''no nos^8''| halfcousin of mine, pigdish! Nor wants to! A ham!

— May we petition you, Shaun illustrious, then, to unravel in your own sweet words to your very humble and most obsequient, we suggested, as to how?

— You may and welcome, Shaun replied, taking at the same time ^|8'as his hunger got the bitter of him^8'| a hearty bite out of the honeycomb of his ^|8Braham and Melo's edibleº^8| hat^|8', tryone, tryon and triune^8'|. Ann wunkum. Sure I thunkum you knew all about that through thelementary channels long agum. Sure that is as commonpleas now and bunkum as Nelson his pillar. ^|8Beerman's bluff was what begun it^|a, Old Knoll and his barrowing^a|.º ^|aAnd then the lilies ofº the veldt^|b, Nancy Nickies and Folletta Lajambe^b|.º Then ^|~me mem^~| and ^|byou hem^b| and the ^|bjemjack jak jaquejack^b|. So betwee Budha and Pash?^a| I regret to announce^8| For two days she kept ^|8howling squealing^8| down for noisy priors and bawling out in Shemish ^|8about the Balt and his loyal divorces, tse, tse,º^8| and him^|8', the ^|acrybibber cribibber,º^a|8'| like an ambitrickster, ^|8'slooped fast asloopedº^8'| in ^|8'the entran intrance to^8'| his polthronechair with his sixth finger between his catseye and the index, engrossing to his ganderpan ^|8'what theº idioglossary^8'| he invented under hicks hyssop. ^|8Hock!º^8| I gave him that toock, imitator! And it was entirely theck latter to blame. ^|8|~Does he drinkº because I am sorely there shall be no moreº Kates and Nells?º^~|8| It was given meeck to assist at the whole thing byck special chancery licence. As often as I think of that unbloody housewarmer Shem Skrivenitch, always cutting my prhose to please his phrase, bigorror, I declare I get the jawache! ^|8|~Does he drink because I am sorely there shall be no more Kates and Nells?^~|8| You know, he's peculiar, that eggschicker. He was grey at three ^|8'and repented at seven^8'|. ^|8'He's weird, I tell you. That's whyº he was forbidden tomate.^8'| Then he was pusched out of ^|8'Thingamuddy's^8'| school ^|8'by Miss Garterdº^8'| for itching. Then he caught the europicolas ^|8'andº went into the society of jewses^8'|. One temp the freak wanted to put his bilingual head intentionally through the Irish Tames and go and join the clergy ^|8'as a dominical skyterrier^8'|. Inkupot! Your puddin is cooked! You're served, cram ye! Fatefully yours.

— But for what, Shaun of grace? weakly we went on to ask now of the gracious one. Vouchsafe to say. You will now, goodness, won't you? ^|8'Why?^8'|

— For his ^|8root^8| language, ^|8'if you ask me whys,º footinmouther,º^8'| Shaun replied as he blessed himself devotionally like a crossbun ^|8as an act of oblivion^8|, (what the thickuns else?) which he picksticked into his lettruce invrention.

— But you could come near it, we do suppose, strong Shaun O', we foresupposed. ^|8'How?^8'|

— Peace! Peace! Shaun replied in penultimatum ^|8'as he swigged a slug of Jon Jacobsen from his treestem sucker cane^8'|. ^|8'Tis perils before Sweenys.º^{8| |8'}Mild butº likesome!^8'| I might as well be talking to the four waves ^|8till Tibbs' and the gray of eveº ^|aand the west'sº asleep^a|8|. ^|8Frost!^8| No-one in his ^|8'seven^8'| senses could, as I have before said, only you missed my drift, for it's being incendiary. The lowquacity of him!
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With his threestar monothong! ^|8Thaw!^8| The last word in stolentelling! And what's more, rightdown lowbrown schisthematic robblemint! Yes. As he was rising
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my lather. Like you. And as I was plucking his goosybone. Like yea. He store the tale of me ^|8''shir shurº^8''|. Like yup.

— Still in a way, not to flatter you, we fancy you that are so strikingly brainy and well letterread on yourshelves could use worse of yourself, ingenious Shaun, we still fancied, if only you would take ^|8your time and^8| the trouble of so doing it.

— Undoubtedly but that is show, Shaun replied, the muttermelk ^|8'of his blood donor^8'| beginning to work, ^|8it would be a bad day I could not so you can keep your space,º^8| and by the power of blurry wards I could do it (I am convicted of it!) any time ever I liked ^|8'(bet ye fippence !)^8'| with the greatest transfusiasm as, you see, while I can soloquise better than most, it is an openear secret, be it said, how I am extremely ingenuous at the clerking even with my ^|8left hand badily left^8| and as easy as I'd perorate a chickerow of peas and my trifolium librotto^|8', the authordux Book of Lifé,^8'| would far exceed what that bogus bolshy of a Shame, my soamheis brother, is conversant with in audible black and prink. And one of these fine days, man dear, that I may cut my throat with my tongue tonight but I may willhap be ^|8ormuzd^8| moved to introvent it just like a work of merit, mark my words, that will open your eye for you, broather brooher, only for as ^|8a papst and^8| an immature ^|8and a ^|~spaciman spaciaman^~| spaciosum^8| and a hundred and ^|8one eleven^8| other things I would never for anything take so much trouble of ^|8so such^8| doing. And why so? Because I am altogether a chap too fly and hairyman for to ^|8do infradig^8| the like of that ^|8ultravirulence^8|. And by all I hold sacred I swear to you on my ^|8pipe piop^8|
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and oath by the awe of Shaun (and that's a ^|8'hell howl^8'| of a name!) that I will commission to the flames any incendiarist whosoever ^|8or ahriman howsoclever^8| who would endeavour to set ever anny roner moother of mine on fire. I will soho!

And big hottempered husky pugiliser such as he was, he all but broke down on the mooherhead,
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overpowered by himself with the love of the tearsilver that he twined through her hair, for sure he was the soft slob of the world and as innocent ^|8and undesignin undesignful^8| as the freshfallen ^|8calf calef^8|. Still he laughed it off with a gulp apologetic. Mind you, that he was in the dumpest of earnest orthough him jawr war hoo hleepy hor halk urthing hurther. Like that only he stopped short and, in looking up from his timeshackled wrists upon the ^|8'pansiful^8'| heathvens of ^|8'jewpeter joepeter^8'| as they ^|8were are telling^8| not but ^|8were and^8| will be^|8, all told,º^8| to feel out what age he might find by Charles' Wain his thumbs fell into his fists and, losing the harmonical balance of his ballbearing extremities, ^|8by the holy kettle,º^8| over he careened by the mightyfine weight of his barrel ^|8(what that prevented the happening of, who^|a,º if not the asterisks that betwinkº themselves,º^a| shall ever?)^8| and, as the wisest course he could take, collapsed ^|8'together in ensemble^8'| and rolled buoyantly backwards in less than a twinkling via Rattigan's corner out of further earshot with his highly curious mode of slipashod motion^|8', surefoot, sorefoot, slickfoot,
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slackfoot, and by Killesther's lapes and falls,^8'| with corks and staves and treeleaves and more bubbles to his keelrow a fairish and easy way enough ^|8'as the town cow cries^8'| behind the times in the direction of MacAuliffe's, the crucethouse, before he was really uprighted ^|8'ere ^|ain a dip of the downs^a| he miraculously disappaled^{8'| |8}from circular circulatio^8|. ^|8|~Awe Ah,^~| mean!º^8|

^|8'And the strewers were shinings.º And the earthnight was aromatose. His pibrook creppt ^|ain mong^a| the duskness. A reek was waft on the luftstream. He was ours, all fragrance. And we were his for our lifetime. O dulcid dreamings,º languidous! Tabacco!^8'|

^|8'It was sharming! But scharmeng!º^8'|

Well, it is to ^|8be regretted bedowern^8| that thou art passing hence, ^|8mine bruder,^8| able Shaun, from carnal relations and familiar faces, ^|8'beyond cods' cradle and pikes' plain,º^{8'| |8}to ^|athe indsº of^a| Tuskland where the Oliphantsº ^|acome scrum^a| from ^|aor to, tillº^a| the ousts of Amiracles where the stories grow,º^8| more is the pity, but for all your deeds of goodness you were forever doing, as our humbler classes, whose favourite virtue is humility, can tell, it is hardly we can part you, for you were the walking saint, you were. Musha, be thinking of us ^|8'out there in Cockland,^8'| poor twelve o'clock scholars sometime or other anywhen you find the time. Wisha, be coming back to us ^|8'way home in Biddyhouse^8'| one way or the other anyhow, we miss your smile.
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And may the moss of prosperousness gather you rolling home! May foggy dews bediamondise your hooprings! May the fireplug of filiality reinsure your bunghole! May the barleywind behind glow luck to your bathershins! 'Tis well we know you were loth to leave us, winding your hobbledehorn, right royal post, but sure, pulse of our slumber, ^|8'by the grace of Votre Dame,º^8'| you will ^|8'skiff across skiffº across the Moylendsea and^8'| round up ^|8in your own escapology^8| some ^|8'boxing canonisator's^8'| day or other digging snow like the good man you are with your ^|8'boxing^8'| pockets turned ^|8'inside knockside^8'| out ^|8|ato in^a| the rake of the rain^8| for fresh remittances, and from that till this in any case may the ^|8grass tussocks^8| grow quickly under your ^|8feet ^|~uprights trampthicketsº^~|8| and the daisies trip lightly over your toetops.