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º

(U84 12.001-150)

Iº was just ^|1talking saying passing the time of day^1| with Old Troy ^|1of the DMP^1| at the corner of Arbour hill there and be damned but a bloody sweep came by along and he near put his gear into my eye. I turned around to let him have the weight of my tongue and who ^|1did should^1| I see ^|1but Hynes^1| coming ^|1along^1| out of Stony Batter ^|1but Joe Hynes^1|.

— Hello, Joe, says I. How are you blowing? Did you see that c bloody chimneysweep near shoving my eye out with his brush? I ha

— ^|1Sooty is lucky Soot's luck^1|, says Joe. Who's the old ballocks you're were talking to?

— Old Troy, says I, that was in the force. By I'm ^|1in on^1| two minds ^|1not^1| to give that fellow in charge for obstructing the path ^|1with his brooms and ladders^1|.

— What are you doing round those parts^|1,?^1| says Joe

— Faith, says I, ^|1not devil a^1| much. There's an ^|1old fellow ^|abloody big^a| foxy thief^1| round there ^|1beyond ^|aby the garrison church^a|1| at the corner of Chicken lane. ^|1I was just asking Old Troy about him Old Troy was just giving me a wrinkle about him^{1| |1}that got lifted^1| any God's quantity of tea and sugar ^|1to^1| pay three bob a week said he had a farm in the county Down ^|1from off^1| a ^|1fellow hop o' my thumb^1| by the name of ^|1Moses^1| Herzog over there near Heytesbury street.

— Circumcised^|1,?^1| says Joe

— ^|1Ay Yes^1|, says I, a bit off the top. An old ^|1fellow plumber^1| named Geraghty. I'm on to his taw the for the ^|1last past^1| fortnight and I can't get a penny
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outº of him.

— Is that ^|1your lay the lay you're on^1| now? says Joe

— Ay, ^|1by God,^1| says I, ^|1how are the mighty fallen?^1| collector of bad & doubtful debts. But that's ^|1the bloodiest ^|aas bloody an the most notorious^a|1| old schemer ^|1as you you'd^1| meet in a day's walk ^|1and the face of him all pockmarks that'd hold a shower of rain^1|. ^|1Jesus, he says Tell him, says he^1|, ^|1if I call again he'll lodge an information against him, so I will if he sends you ^|around^a| here again I'll have him summonsed before the court, so I will^1| for trading without a licence. ^|1And he after stuffing his guts till he's fit to burst^1| Jesus, I had to laugh at the ^|1little^1| jewy getting his shirt out. He drink ^|1me^1| my teas. He eat ^|1me^1| my sugars. He pay my moneys. Why he not no pay ^|1me^1| my moneys?

For ^|1perishable^1| goods bought of ^|1M. Moses^1| Herzog, of 13 S. Kevin's parade in the city of Dublin, Wood quay ward, merchant, ^|1hereinafter called the ^|apurchaser vendor^a|1| and sold and delivered to ^|1M. Michael^1| E. Geraghty, esquire, of 29 Arbour hill in the city of Dublin, Arran quay ward, gentleman ^|1hereinafter called the purchaser^1|: videlicet, five pounds of ^|1first choice^1| tea ^|1avoirdupois^1| at three shillings per pound ^|1avoirdupois^1| and three stone of sugar, crushed crystal, at threepence per pound avoidupois,. The said purchaser ^|1M. Michael^1| E. Geraghty debtor to the said vendor, ^|1M. Moses^1| Herzog, for of one pound five shillings and sixpence sterling ^|1for value received^1| which amount shall be paid by said purchaser to said vendor in weekly instalments every seven ^|1Calendar^1| days of three shillings ^|1no pence^1| sterling: and the said ^|1perishable^1| goods shall not be pawned or pledged
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orº sold or otherwise alienated by the said purchaser but but shall be and remain ^|1& be held to be^1| the sole and exclusive of property of the said vendor to be disposed of at his ^|1good^1| will and pleasure until the said amount of one pound five shillings and sixpence sterling shall have duly paid by ^|1the^1| said purchaser to ^|1the^1| said vendor in the manner herein set forth as agreed ^|1this day^1| hereby agreed ^|1upon^1| between said vendor, for himself, his heirs, issue ^|1trustees^1| and assigns on the one part and said purchaser, for himself, his heirs, issue^|1, trustees^1| and assigns on the other part.

— Are you a strict t.t.? says Joe.

— I'm not taking anything between drinks, says I.

— What about paying our respects to Christy ^|1Nixon, Meagher?^{1| |1}says Joe^1|

— He's up in John of God's, says I, gone off his head, poor man.

— Drinking his own stuff, says Joe.

— That's it, says I, whisky and water on the brain.

— Come around to ^|1Barney Kiernan's Barney's^1|, says Joe. I want to the see the citizen.

— ^|1Barney's Barney Mavourneen's^1| be it, says I. Anything strange or wonderful, Joe?

— Not a word, says Joe. I was up at that meeting in the City Arms

— What was that ^|1Joe^1|? says I

— The cattle traders, says Joe, about the foot and mouth disease. I want to give the citizen the hard word about it.
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Soº we ^|1went bevelled^1| around by the Linenhall ^|1& the courthouse^1|, talking ^|1about of^1| one thing or another. Decent fellow, Joe, when he has it but sure like that he never has it. God, I couldn't get over that bloody foxy Geraghty. For trading without a licence, says he.

So we ^|1went turned^1| into Barney Kiernan's and there, sure enough, was the citizen as large as life up in the corner having a great confab ^|1with^1| himself and the bloody old mangy dog ^|1Garryowen^1| and he waiting for what the ^|1Lord'd send him sky would drop in the way of drink^1|

— There he is, says I, in his glory hole, working for the cause.

The old mongrel let a growl out of him ^|1would give you the creeps^1|. Be a corporal work of mercy if someone would take the life of that bloody dog. I'm told ^|1for a fact^1| he ate half the breeches of a constabulary man ^|1in Santry^1| one time that came round pestering ^|1about for^1| a licence.

— Stand and deliver, says he ^|1blank^1|

— That's all right, citizen, says Joe. Friends here.

— Pass, friends, says he^|1, doing the Vinegar hill touch.^1|

Then he rubs his hand in his eye and says he:

— What's your opinion of the times.

Doing the rapparee touch. But, by God, Joe was equal to the occasion.

— I thinks think the markets are on a rise, says he, sliding his hand down his fork.
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Soº the citizen claps his paw on his knee and says he:

— Foreign wars is the cause of it.

And says Joe, sticking his thumb in his pocket:

— It's the Russians wish to tyrannise.

— Ah, give over your bloody codding, Joe, says I. I've a thirst on me I wouldn't sell for half a crown.

— Give it a name, citizen, says Joe.

— The wine of the country, says he.

— What's yours,? says Joe.

— Ditto MacAnaspey, says I.

— Three pints, Terry, says Joe.

(U84 12.206-243)

And begob ^|1true as you're there^1| he ^|1outs lands out^1| with a golden sovereign

— Were you robbing a poorbox? says I.

— Sweat of my brow, says Joe.
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^|1'Twas the prudent member gave me the wheeze.

Who comes through Michan's land, a hero in sable ^|agarb armour^a|? O'Bloom, the son of Rory, it is he. Impervious to all fear ^|athe hero is Rory's son^a|, he of the prudent soul.^1|
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— For the old woman of Prince's street, says the citizen, the subsidised organ. And look at this blasted rag, says he, the Independent. The Irish Independent, if you please. Founded by Parnell to be the workingman's friends. Listen to their names.

And he starts reading out the births, deaths and marriages.

— Bennett, Vancouver road, ^|1Forest Hill^1| London. Carr, Hanwell, London. Gordon, Barnfield Crescent, Exeter. Redmayne at Iffley, Saint Anne's-on-Sea the wife of William T Redmayne of a son. How's that for Irish Ireland? says he. And listen to the deaths, says he. Bristow at Whitehorse Lane, London. Cann, at Manor road, Stoke Newington.
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Cockburnº at the Moat House, Chepstow …

— I know that fellow, says Joe, from bitter experience.

— Dimsey ^|1|xat Crouch end^x|1|, says the citizen, the wife of David Griffiths Dimsey, late of the admiralty. Miller, Tottenham aged 85. Welsh, June 12 at 35 Canning street Liverpool, Isabella Helen, eldest daughter of the late Alexander Welsh. How's that for William Martin Murphy, says he, the Bantry jobber!? ^|1Wouldn't it make poor Parnell turn in his grave? How's that for a national press?^1|

— Ah, well, says Joe^|1, handing round the boose^1|. Thanks be to God they had the start of ^|1us me^1|. Drink that, citizen

— I will, says he, honourable person.

— Health, Joe, says I.

I was badly in want of that pint, don't be talking. Jesus, I could hear it hit the pit of my stomach with a click.

——