— How good you are! But could you, of course, decent Lettrechaun (to change your name if not your nation), we knew, while still in the barrel, read the strangewrote anaglyptics of those Shemletters patent for His Christian's Em?
— Greek! Hand it to me! Shaun replied plosively, pointing to the cinnamon quistoquill behind his acoustrolobe. I'm as afterdusk nobly Roman as pope and water could christen me. Look at that for a ridingpin! I am, by Sing Larynx, letterpotent to play the sem backwards like Oscan wild or
|12unshent inshantº12| Persse |s12or from the Ottoman
|shtransluding from the Ott
Othermansh|s12| or off the Toptic off the types
of my finklers in the draught or with buttles, with my oyes thickshut and all. But, hellas, it is horrebrew bad on the corns and callouses. As far as that goes I associate myself with your remark just now from theodicy re furloined notepaper and quite agree in your prescriptions for indeed I am, pay Gay, in juxtaposition to say it is not a nice production. It is a pinch of scribble. Not worth a bottle of cabbage. Overdrawn! |s12|shPuffedly offal tosh.sh|s12| Besides, it's auctionable, all about crime and libel! Nothing beyond clerical horrors et omnibus to be entered for the foreign as secondclass matter. |12|shThe fuellest filth ever fired since Charley Lucan's!ºsh|12|
Flummery is what I would call it if you were to ask me to put it on a single dimension what pronounced opinion I might orally have about them bagses of trash which the mother and Mr Unmentionable has reduced to writing without making news out of my sootynemm. When she slipped under her couchman. And where he made a cat with a peep. How they wore two madges on the makewater. And why there were treefellers in the shruburbs. Then he hawks his handmud figgers from Francie to Fritzie down in the kookin. Phiz is me mother and Hair's me father, Bauv Betty Famm and Pig Pig Pike. Comme bien! Comme bien! Feefeel! Feefeel! And the Dutches dyin loffin at his pon peck de Baree. And all the mound reared! Till he wot not what to begin he should. An infant sailing eggshells on the floor of a wet day would have more sabby.
Letter, carried of Shaun, son of Hek, written of Shem, brother of Shaun,
Alp, mother of Shem, for Hek, father of Shaun. Initialled. Gee. Gone. 29 Hardware Saint. Baile-Atha-Cliath, 31 |v12Jun, Jan.v12| 11.32 A.D. Here Commerces Enville. Tried Apposite House. 13 Fitzgibbets. Loco.
Dangerous. Tax 9d. B. L. Guineys, esqueer. L.B. Not known as 1132 a. 12 Norse Richmound. Nave unlodgeable. Loved noa's dress. Sinned, Jetty Pierrse. Noon sick parson. 92 Winsewer. Ave. No such no. Vale. Finn's Hot. Exbelled from 1014 d. Pulldown. Fearview. Opened by Miss Take. 965 nighumpledansextiffits. Shout at Site. Roofloss. Fit Dunlop and
|v12be Bev12| Satisfied. Mr Domnall O'Domnally, Q.V. 8 Royal Terrors. None so strait. Shutter up. Dining with the Danes. Removed to Philip's Burke. At sea. D.E.D. Place scent on. Clontalk. Father
Jacob, Rice Factor. 3 Castlewoos, P.V. Arrusted. J.P. Converted to Hospitalism. |12In Ere12| the March
|12past12| of Civilisation. Once Bank of Ireland's. Return to City Arms. 2 Milchbroke. Wrongly spilled. Traumcondraws. Now Bunk of England's. Drowned in the Laffey. Here. The Reverest Adam Foundlitter. Shown geshotten. 7 Streetpetres. Since Cabrank. Seized of
the Crownd. Well, Sir Arthur. Buy
|v12Patterson's Patersen'sv12| Matches. Unto his promisk hands. House
Condamned by Ediles. Back in Few Minutes. Closet for Repeers. 60 Shellburn. Key at Kate's. Kiss. Isaac's Butt, Poor Man. Dalicious arson. Caught. Missing. Justiciated. Kainly forewarred. Abraham Badly's King, Park Bogey. Salved. All reddy berried. Hollow and eavy. Desert it. Overwayed. Understumped. Back to the P.O. Owns owe M.O. Too Let. To Be Soiled. Cohabited by Unfortunates. Lost all Licence. His |+12'Beef Bouf+|12'| Toe is Frozen Over. X, Y and Z, Ltd, Destinied Tears. A.B, ab, Sender. Boston (Mass), 31 |v12Jan, Jun.ºv12| 13.12 P.D. Razed. Lawyered. Vacant. Mined. Here's the Bayleaffs. Step out to |+12'Hull Hall+|12'| out of that, Ereweaker, with your Bloody Big Bristol. Bung. Stop. Bung. Stop. Cumm Bumm. Stop. Came Baked to Auld Aireen. Stop.
— Kind Shaun, we all requested, much as we hate to say it but since you rose to the use of money have you not, without suggesting for an instant, millions of moods used up slanguage tun times as words as the penmarks used out in sinscript with such hesitancy by your cerebrated brother — excuse me not mentioningahem?
— CelebrAted! Shaun replied under the sheltar of his broguish, vigorously rubbing his magic lantern to a glow of fullconsciousness. HeCitEncy! Your words grates on my ares. Notorious I rather would feel inclined to myself in the first place to describe Mr O'Shem the Draper
lettersh|ºs12| as should I be accentually called upon to pass my opinions|s12,
|shproperly spewingsh|,s12| into impulsory irelitz. But I would not care to be so unfruitful to my own
part as to swear for the moment positively as to the views of Denmark. No, sah! But let me say my every belief before my high Gee is that I much doubt of it.
|12missing12| I've no room for that fellow
|s12|shon my fagroastersh|s12|. I
just can't. As I hourly learn from Rooters and Havers through Gilligan's maypoles he is on his last |12'|+with |shillegible
clergimanitissh|+|12'|, boasting always of his ruddy complexious! She, the mammyfar, was put up to it by him, the iniquity, that ought to be depraved of his libertins|s12,
|shtoº be silenced, sackclothed
and suspendedsh|,s12| and placed in irons into some drapery institution off the antipopees for wordsharping only if he could pass the panel fleischcurers |s12and the |shfieldpost censorsh|s12|. For that is well celibated before the four divorce courts and all the King's paunches how he has the solitary from seeing Scotch snakes and has consumption and dalickeycyphalos on his brach premises where he can dejeunerate into a skillyton and be thinking himself to death. Rot him! Flannelfeet! Flattyro! I will describe you in a word. (12'|shThou. (Iº beg your pardon.)ºsh|12') Homo! Then putting his bedfellow on me! (12'|shLikeº into mikesh| and nick onto post.º12') The criniman! I'll give it to him for
that! (12'|shMaking the lobbard change his stopssh|º, |shas we say in the long booksh|.º12') Is he on whosekeeping or are my? (12'|shObnoximostsh| |shposthumust!sh|º12') With his unique hornbook and his prince of the apauper's pride, blundering all over the two worlds! If he waits till I buy him a mosselman's present! He's nos halfcousin of mine, pigdish! Nor wants to! I'd famish with the cuistha first. A ham!
— May we petition you, Shaun illustrious, then, to |s12|shput |sayour hissa| |+prince's prentis'+| pride in yourº |+aproper's+| pursesh| and tos12| unravel in your own sweet |s12way withs12| words of style to your very humble and most obsequient, we suggested, |12(+|shwith an esiop's foible,ºsh|+)12| as to how?
— |s12You |shWell,º
it is partly my own, isn't it,sh|º and yous12| may, ought and welcome, Shaun replied,
taking at the same time as his hunger got the bitter of him a hearty bite out of the honeycomb of his Braham and Melo's edible hat, tryone, tryon and triune. Ann wunkum. Sure I thunkum you knew all about that|12, h
|shHonoreysº causessh|,12| through thelementary channels long
agum. Sure that is as commonpleas now (12'to allus
|shpueblowssh|12') and bunkum as Nelson his
(12'trifulgurayous12') pillar. |12|shLet me see,
do.sh|12| Beerman's bluff was what begun it, Old Knoll and his barrowing. And then the lilies of the veldt, Nancy Nickies and Folletta Lajambe. Then mem and hem and the jaquejack.
|12|shAll about Wucherer and righting his name for
him.sh|12| I regret to announce|s12, after laying out |shhis
litterery bedsh|,s12| for two days she kept squealing down for noisy priors and bawling out in Shemish (12'huw Ananymus
|shpinched her tightssh|12') about the Balt and his loyal divorces,
(12'|shwhen he feraxiouslyº shed
|s+eggs ovass+|sh| in Alemaney,12') tse, tse, and him, the cribibber, like an
ambitrickster, |12|shaspiringsh| like the decan's,12| fast aslooped in the intrance to his
polthronechair with his sixth finger between his catseye and the index, |s12|shmaking his pillgrimace of Childe Childº
Horridsh|,s12| engrossing to his ganderpan |12|~,
|shin hog bloodtoosh|,~|12| the idioglossary he invented under hicks hyssop! Hock! Ickick
gave him that toock, imitator! And it was entirely theck latter to blame. Does he drink because I am sorely there shall be no more Kates and Nells? |12|shIf you see him it took place
thensh|º.12| It was given meeck|12'|+,
|shthank the Benchsh|,+|12'| to assist at the whole thing byck special chancery licence. As often as I
think of that unbloody housewarmer Shem Skrivenitch, always cutting my prhose to please his phrase, bigorror, I declare I get the jawache! (12'|shBe
|shhis reflectionsh| |shhe'd begin his beogrefright in muddyass
ribaldssh|.12') You know, he's peculiar, that eggschicker
|12(+|shwith the smell of old woman off
himsh|+)12||12'|+, to suck nothing of his
|s12|shM.D. made his |~antemortem ante
mortem~| for him.sh|s12| He was grey at three
|12|shlikeº Sygnusº the
swansh|º12| when he made his boo to the
public and barnacled up to the eyes when he repented |s12at afters12| seven. |s12|shHe |sacaught was down withsa| the whooping laugh at the age of the loss of reason, the whopping first time he prediseased me.sh|s12| He's weird, I tell you, and middayevil. |s12|shNever mind his falls feetsh| and |shhis tanbark complexionsh|.s12| That's why he was forbidden tomate and was warmed off the ricecourse of marrimoney |s12underº the |shHelpless Corpses Enactmentsh|s12|. |s12|shI'm not at all surprised the saint kicked himsh|. (+|shNegas, negasti — negertop, negertoe, negertoby, negrunter!sh|+)s12| Then he was pusched out of Thingamuddy's school by Miss Garterd for itching. Then he caught the europicolas and went into the society of jewses. One temp, when he foiled to be killed, the freak wanted to put his bilingual head intentionally through the Irish Tames and go and join the |+12'clergy clericy+|12'| as a |+12'dominical demonican+|12'| skyterrier. (12'|shThrowing dust in the eyes of the Hooley Farmerssh|!º |shHe used to be avowdeed as he ought to be vitandustsh|º. For onced I squeaked by twyst I'll squelch him.12') Then he went to Cecilia's treat on his solo to pick up Galen. Inkupot! |s12|shHe has encaust in the blood.sh| Shim!s12| I have the outmost contempt for. |s12Prost bitten! |shConshy!sh| |shLeavesh| |shyour libber to T.C.D.ºsh|s12| Your puddin is cooked! You're served, cram ye! Fatefully yaourth... Ex. Ex. Ex. Ex.
— For his root language, if you ask me whys, footinmouther, Shaun replied as he blessed himself devotionally like a (12'crossbun crawsbomb12') making act of oblivion, (what the thickuns else?) which he picksticked into his lettruce invrention. (12'(++blank Ullhodturdenweirmudgaardgringnirurdrmolnirfenrirlukkilokkibaugimandodrerinsurtkrinmgernrackinarockar!º++) Thor's for yo!12')
— |s12Peace! Peace! |shPease!
Pease!sh|s12| Shaun replied in vealar penultimatum as he swigged a slug of Jon Jacobsen from his treestem sucker cane. 'Tis perils before Sweenys. Mild but likesome! I might as well be talking to the four waves till Tibbs' gray eve and the
west's asleep. Frost! Nope! No-one in his seven senses could, as I have before said, only you missed my drift, for it's being incendiary. Every dimmed letter in it is a copy and not a few of the silbils and wholly words I can show you in my Kingdom of Heaven. The lowquacity of him!
With his threestar monothong! Thaw! The last word in stolentelling! And what's more, rightdown lowbrown schisthematic robblemint! Yes. As he was rising
my lather. Like you. And as I was plucking his goosybone. Like yea. He store the tale of me shur. Like yup. |s12|shHow's that for Shemese?sh|s12|
— Still in a way, not to flatter you, we fancy you that are so strikingly brainy and well letterread on yourshelves could use worse of yourself, ingenious Shaun, we still fancied, if only you would take your time and the trouble of so doing it.
— Undoubtedly but that is show, Shaun replied, the muttermelk of his blood donor beginning to work, (12'and while |shinnocent of disseminating the foul
emanationsh|º12') it would be a bad day I could not so you can keep your space, and by the power of blurry wards I am loyable to do it (I am convicted of it!) any time ever I cheesed to (bet ye fippence off me
boot allowance!) with the greatest transfusiasm as, you see, while I can soloquise better than most, it is an openear secret, be it said, how I am extremely ingenuous at the clerking even with my badily left and I'd pinsel it as easy as I'd perorate a chickerow of |s12peas
beans |shfor the price of two |+miracles
maricles,º+|sh|s12| and my trifolium librotto, the authordux Book of Life, would, if given to
daylight |s12(|shI hold a most incredible faith about
itsh|)s12|, far exceed what that bogus bolshy of a Shame, my soamheis brother, is conversant with in audible black and prink. And one of these fine days, man dear,
the mood is on mesh|,s12| that I may cut my throat with my tongue tonight but I may willhap be ormuzd moved to take potlood in hand and introvent it Paatryk just like a work of merit, mark my words,
(12'and |shappend to my mark
twangsh|,12') that will open your pucktricker's ops for you, broather brooher, only for as a papst and an immature and a spaciaman spaciosum and a hundred and eleven other things I would never for anything take so much trouble of such
doing. And why so? Because I am altogether a chap too fly and hairyman for to infradig the like of that ultravirulence. And by all I hold sacred on earth, clouds and in heaven I swear to you on my piop
and oath by the awe of Shaun (and that's a howl of a name!) that I will commission to the flames any incendiarist whosoever or ahriman howsoclever who would endeavour to set ever |+12'anny annyma+|12'| roner moother of mine on fire. Rock me, Julie, but I will soho!
And big hottempered husky pugiliser such as he was, he |s12all but
|shvirtuallysh|s12| broke down on the mooherhead,
getting quite jerry over her, overpowered by himself with the love of the tearsilver that he twined through her hair, for sure he was the soft slob of the world |12with |shloads of feeling in himsh|12| and as innocent and undesignful as the freshfallen calef. Still |s12as on the fulmament he gaped in wulderments12| (12'|shgrossly unselfishsh| |shin sickselfsh|,12') he |12'|s+|shdished allarmes away andsh|s+|12'| laughed it off with a wipe at his pudgies and a gulp apologetic. (12'|shHim belly no belong sollow |s+moles+| pigeon.sh| Ally bullyº. Fu Li's gulpa.12') Mind you, that he was in the dumpest of earnest orthough him jawr war hoo hleepy hor halk urthing hurther. Like that only he stopped short and, in looking up up up from his tideshackled wrists through the ghost of an ocean upon the wieds of pansiful heathvens of joepeter as they are telling not but were and will be, all told, scruting foreback into the fargoneahead to feel out what age in years tropical, ecclesiastic, civil or sidereal he might find by the sirious pointstand of Charley's Wain (what betune the spheres sledding along the lacteal and the mansions of the blest turning on old times)|12'|+, asº erewhile had he craved of thus,+|12'| |s12|shthe |v+dreamschwindel dreamskhwindelv+| necklassoed him,sh|s12| his thumbs fell into his fists and, losing the harmonical balance of his ballbearing extremities, by the holy kettle, like a flask of lightning over he careened (O the sons of the fathers!) by the mightyfine weight of his barrel (all that prevented the happening of, who, if not the asterisks betwink themselves, shall ever?) and, as the wisest postlude he could playact, collapsed in ensemble and rolled buoyantly backwards in less than a twinkling via Rattigan's corner out of further earshot with his highly curious mode of slipashod motion, surefoot, sorefoot, slickfoot,
slackfoot, and by Killesther's lapes and falls, with corks and staves and treeleaves and more bubbles to his keelrow a fairish and easy way enough as the town cow cries behind the times in the direction of MacAuliffe's, the crucethouse, before he was really uprighted ere in a dip of the downs he |s12miraculously spoorlesslys12| disappaled and vanesshed from circular circulatio. Ah, mean!
And the stellas were shinings. And the earthnight strewed aromatose. His pibrook creppt mong the donkness. A reek was waft on the luftstream. He was ours, all fragrance. And we were his for a lifetime. O dulcid dreamings, languidous! Taboccoo!
It was sharming! But scharmeng!
Well, it is to bedowern that thou art passing hence, mine bruder, able Shaun, from carnal relations and familiar faces, beyond cods' cradle and porpoise plain, to the inds of Tuskland where the Oliphants scrum from, till the ousts of Amiracles where the toll stories grow proudest, more is the pity, but for all your deeds of goodness you were forever doing, as our humbler classes, whose
virtue is humility, can tell, it is hardly we in the country of the old, Sean Moy, can part you, for you were the walking saint, you were, the graced of gods and pittites and the salus of the wake. Musha, beminded of us out there in Cockpit, poor twelve o'clock scholars sometime or other anywhen you think the time. Wisha, becoming back to us way home in Biddyhouse one way or the other anyhow,
we miss your smile.
|s12|shOur peoplesh| |shwill not be f after forgetting yoush|. |shHow you would be thinking in your thoughtsº how the deepings did it all begin and how you would be scrimmaging through your scruples to collar a hold of an imperfection being |+committed committled+|.sh|s12| Sireland calls you. Mery Loye is saling moonlike. And Slyly Mamourneen is ladymaid at Gladshouse Lodge. Turn your |s12|~redy~|s12| coat, strong character, and tarry among us down the vale, seat, only once more. And may the moss of prosperousness gather you rolling home! May foggy dews bediamondise your hooprings! May the fireplug of filiality reinsure your bunghole! May the barleywind behind glow luck to your bathershins! 'Tis well we know you were loth to leave us, winding your hobbledehorn, right royal post, but sure, pulse of our slumber, by the grace of Votre Dame, |s12|shwhen the natural mourningº of your nocturne blankmerges into the national morning of golden sunupsh|,s12| you will skiff across the Moylendsea and round up in your own escapology some canonisator's day or other, sack on back, alack, digging snow (not so?) like the good man you are with your picture pockets turned knockside out in the rake of the rain for fresh remittances, and from that till this in any case may the tussocks grow quickly under your trampthickets and the daisies trip lightly over your battercops.