Lowly,º longly a wail went forth. Pure Yawn lay low. On the mead of the hillock heº lay, brief wallet to his side, anº arm looseº by his staff of citron briar. Most distressfully (but, my dear, how successfully!) to wail he did, his locks of a Lucan tinge, quickrich, ripely rippling, unfilleted, those lashbetasselled lids on the verge of closing time, whiles out of his sidewiseopen mouth the breath of himº evenso languishing as the princeliest treble treacle or |3lichoo lichee3| chewchow purse could buy. Yawn in a semiswoon lay awailing and (hooh!) what helpings of honeyfulº swoothead! (phew!) which earpiercing dulcitude! As were you suppose to go and push with your bluntblank pin in hand upintohisº fleshasplush cushionettes of some chubby boyboldº love of an angel. Hwoah!
When,º as the buzzer brings the light brigade, keeping the home fires burning, so on the churring call
themselves came at him from all their cardinal parts, along the amber wayº where Brosna's furzy.
To liftº them they did byº the first quaint skreek of the gloaming,º and they
hopped it up the mountainy molehill, traversing climes of old times gone by,º of the days not worth remembering,º remembering,
inventing some excusethems, any sort, having a sevenply
sweat of nightfears moistº upon them — phopho. foorchtha, aggala, jeeshee, paloola, ooridiminy, Afeardº themselves were to wonder atº the class of coon he would likely be, length by breadth nonplussing his thickness, ells upon ells of him, making so many square yards of him, one half of him in Conn's half but the whole of him nevertheless in Owenmore's five quarters. There would he lay till they would him descry,º spancelled down upon a blossomy bedº at one foulº stretchº amongst the daffydowndillies, the flowers of narcosis fettering his footlights, a halohedge of wild spuds
hovering over him, epicures waltzing with gardenfillers, puritan shoots advancing to Aran chiefs. Phopho! The meteorpulpº of him, the seamless rainbowpeel.º Aggala! His bellyvoid of nebulose with his neverstop navel.º Paloola! And his veins shooting melanite phosphor, his creamtocustardº cometshair and his arrowroot knuckles, ribs and members.º Ooridiminy! His electrolatiginous twisted entrails belt.º
Those four claymen clomb together to hold their sworn inquiry on him. Up to the esker ridge it was,
Mullingarº parish,º to a mead that was not far, the son's rest. First
klettered Matthew Gregory,º through the deep timefield; thenº (Marcus Lyons,º tailing the wavy
line of his partition footsteps) (something in his blisters was telling him all along how he had been in that place one
time);º then Hisº Recordershipº, Dr Luke Tarpey, after honourable sleep, hot on to
the aniseed;º and, up out of his prompt corner, old Johnny Mac, MacDougalº
the hiker,º in the rere of them on the runº to make a quorum. Roping their ass he was, their skygrey
globetrotter, by way of an afterthought,º and such legs on him they were that much oneven it was tumbling he wasº by four lengths to
hear with his unaided ear the harp in the air, the bugle
dianablowing, wild as wild, the mockingbird whose word is misfortune, so 'tis said, the bulbul down the wind.
The proto was traipsing through the tangle then and his station was a few perch to the weatherside of the knoll Usnach and it was from no other place unless there that he proxtended aloof the hand making silence. The buckos beyond on the leaº then stopped wheresoever they found their standings and that way they set watch about him, upholding their broadawake probers'º hats on their firrum heads. And a crack quatyouare of stenoggers they made of themselves, all told, not even to the seclusion of their beast by them that was the oddº trick of the pack. And who should be laying thereº forenenst them only Yawn! All of asprawl he was laying too and, I can tell you something more than that, he was profoundly asleep. And it was far more similar to a satrap he lay there, by satellitesº all surrounded,º or for all I know like theº Lord Lumenº coaching his preferred constellations in faith and doctrine,º for old Matt Gregoryº 'tis he had the starmenagerie:º Marcus Lyons and Lucas Metcalfe Tarpey and the mack that never forgave the ass that lurked behind him, Johnnyº na Hossaleen.
More than their good share ensorcelled you would say themselves were the way they could not rightly tell their heels from their stools,º as they cooched down by his
crib, curchycurchy,º gawking on himº and softnoising one of them to another one, the boguaqueesthers.
And it is what they began to say to him then, the masters, what way was he.
— Yerra, why dat, my leader?
— Or his wind's from the wrong cut, says Ned of the Hill.
— Why so and speak up, do you hear me, you,º sir?
— Or he's rehearsing somewan's funeral.
— Whisht outathat! Hubba's up!
— Chirpy,º come now!
— I'll take on that chap.
Forº it was in the back of their mind's ear how they would be spreading their azurespotted fine attractable net from Matt to the mystagogue after him and from thence to the neighbour and that way to the donkeyman. And in their minds years back so it was how they would be meshing that way
the quaversº of scaly silver and the clutches of chromes of the highly lucid spanishing gold,º whilst, as hour gave way to
hour, with Yawn himself keeping time with his thripthongue,º to ope his
blurbeous lips he wouldº the way mist of the fields and molten moonset would be melding into his mouth.
— This same historical barrow 'tis, the orangery.
— I see. Very good now. It is in your orangery, I take it, you have your letters?º
— So long aforetime?º
— |3Thousands. Millions.3|
—º Now I would like to raise a point of language touching this. There is this maggersº. I am told there are fully six hundred and six words in your language for monarch but not oneº term to signify majesty. Is that the case?º
— Tristan Patrick Dieudonné.
— Are you in your fatherick?
— What are yu shevering about |3like a houn3|? Is there cold on ye?
— I know that place betterº than annyoneº. Sure,º
I used to be always over thereº at my grandmother's place with the long dogs coursing. That's the place for the oysters, Puldudy. I never knew how rich I was carrying my ass along the shore. Didº you know Jasperº Dougal out there, Pat Whateveryournameis?
— Wisha an that's a good wan right enough! Wooluvs no less!º
— One moment now. I would like to put a question. Tell me now this. You told us a moment since about this barrow. Now I suggest to you that ere there was this barrow,º as you call it,º there was a boat. Would you bearº me out in that?º An orange boatº.
— Magnus Spadebeardº. Signed toº me with his balingº scoop. Laid bare his breastpaps to give suck to me, to suckle me.
— Hunckalus Childared Easterheld.
— Was this before Domini nostri
— Well,º he might be both nonobstant
like myself. Tigon or liger. That is an old fellow now and he could be all our |3fathers das, the |abroder brodara| of the founder of the father of the author of the finder of the first man in Ranelagh3|.º
— |3Wulva wulva wulva vulva! Vulva vulva vulva vulva!3|
— South,º I see. Thisº is better. The man that found it there was the man that put it there originally. But how did it come into your possession? That'sº the point I raise now in so many
Now we haveºº cause and
effect. Or I will put it another way. There is a strong suspicion on young Kevin. Now,º have you a reasonable doubt in your mind about him or are you in your post? Spell me that without delay.
— I'll see you farther, blarneying Mark. Thatº innocent,º did I alter him to
hogsfat?º I don't know I'm sure but God
knows I was alteredº first. If I confessed in clean before him why did you,º
my best friend, blather always you would back me to Humphrey
and Nephew for the post and then you roundº and you canvass the other crowd and youº say I'm uppish and not mere Irishº. Well, I may as well correct that now in case of |3temporalities temcoralities3|.º I've my |3pockets |acockets pocketsa|3| full of you |3lay laycreated3| cardinals. My caste is a cut above yours. Look at my brand on meº. Eggs squawfish lean yoe nun feed marecurious!º
I can |3point |acoint pointa|3| to my |3patrician |acatrician patriciana|3| coat of arms. Andº mine is the only |3proper |acroper propera|3| name to be heard in doomsday book. Suck at!º
— Suck it yourself,º sugarstick! Who's askingº to look atº your sore toe? What about your bottlewasher of an old fellowº, tell us? What about the bonafide peachlover, esquireº earwugs? How big was his best friend? The swaaber! The twicer! Bloody curse to him!
—º Niceyº Docº Mistel Lu,º please! Me gnemgnem damfool. Meº no savvy allsameº numpa one Topside Tellmastolyº fella.º Meº savvy nothel time. Goddam cowbellymaamº belongame shepullamealong jackinabossº belongashe.º Me plentymuch boohoo.
— Tantris. I see now.
Now I feel called upon to ask did it ever occur to you,º prior to this,º by a stretchº of
your imagination that you might be very largely substituted by a complementary character?º
— Once or twice and maybe more largely than you yetº realise.º A few times asº I chancedº to be stretching myself in my imaginationº I felt feeling queer roundº my middle aging so that I'm not myself at all.º
— Are you Roma now or Amor now? Tell me, Mr Trickpat.
— I am simpliciter arduus. Bruno and Nolan,º the |3stationery3| lifepartnersº off Nassau Street,º were explaining it
all round each other ere yesterweek. When heupon Nolan Brunoº monopolisesº his egobruno most unwillingly sensesº by the mortal powers alionolan equal and opposite brunoipso, ipso, id estº, eternally provoking alio oppositeº equally as provoked as Bruno at being eternally opposed by Nolan.
— You mean alibiº, do you?
— I mean my alibi brother.
I want to know with much thanks ifº he livesº in Australia or anywhere my fond brother Alibi Nolan, not belonging to these parts whom I recall being a total abstainer.
|3— Who is Mr Nolan?
— Mr Nolan is Mr Gottgab.3|
—º O cross of Cong and water! And he said he was only taking the grass temperature.
|3How voice you that, nice Sandy man? Not big large |agent goodmana| is he, Sandy nice?º3| Ask him |3this one minute3| in his good ear where he dropped his bass's voice.
— Well, I beg to traverse above statement inasmuchº as my revered was confined to guardroom byº
|3Doctor Mannix Doctor Achmed Borumborad,º3| for
repairs done on our premises in the rere of pilch knickers,º property of my deeply revered,º entailing a laxative tendency especially with him being forbidden fruit and certifiedº to have functional
valvular,º and thereinafterº liable to succumb if served with subpenis when my reputed husband
took a drink out of the given bottle, tellingº me of a welcomed experience |3(heº never battered one eye but he lookedº plum into my face like the end of time
)º3| and he simply showed me a poker which was then produced with the remark: This is for Sneak
— Creeping through the children of Mary's class camouflaged as a blancmange and marmalade! Three cheers for the name Dan Magrath!
—º I would misdemean to rebuke to the libels of snots the said Sully, heº isº Magrath's thugº and he is not fit enough to throw guts down to a bear. If they cut his nose on him they had their good reasons. Inasmuch as I am delightful to be able to state that a |3handsome3| sovereign was freely pledged to both lady performers of vocal act by that noblest of magistrates with admired engravingº meaning completeº manly parts during alleged recent act as required by statues. Nowº you see!
— Arrah, man dear, weren't they arriving in all their centuries for to pay their firstrateº duties before him,º in his reunited magazine, the Grand
Oldº MacGuinness Mor, boot kings andº indiarubber umpires and shahs from Paisleyº and sultana raisins and a row of jam sahibs and anº odd principess in her
pretticoat and the queen of playing clubs and the Claddaghº ringleaders and the two salames and the Halfa Ham with two fat maharashersº
and the German silver geyser,º and he polished up gorgeous,º tintinabulatingº to himself. Andº there was J. B. Dunlop, the
tyrant of our times,º French wine stuarts and Tudor keepsakes and the Cesarewitchº for the |3currant currentº3| counter riding up the holy staircase on |3muleyback muleback,º3| hindquarters to the fore and he holding on to his natural anthem,º Horsey, keep your tail up,º and as much as the vacantº throneroomº could safely accommodateº of the house of Orange and Bitters,º permeated by Druids andº Brehons and Flawhoolaghs and Anteparnellites, allº murdering Irish out of their boon companions after plenty ofº fresh stout for to nobble or salvage their bit of him, the poor old basiloose, Dodderick Ogonach Wreck,º lying high as he lay with his buttend up,º exposed for sale after inspection, most highly astounded, as it turned up,º at thus being reduced to nothing.
— |3Tristis! anima mia! Tristris! Anima mea!3|
— Whoisheº whoishe whoishe whoishe linking in? Whoishe whoishe whoishe?
— Lay yer lug till the groun, man. They're playing thimbles and bodkins. Hep!º Whu's within?
We'llº gore them and gash them and gun them and gloat on them.
— O, widows and orphans, it's the yeomen! Redshanks for ever!
— Theº cry of the deer it is!
Christº in the fort! Christ in the chariotseat!
O cloudy father! Unsure! Nongood!
Pipetteº dear! Me! Me!
Fort!º Fort! Bayroyt! March!
Myº price, my precious?
Brinabride, myº price! When you sell get my price!
Pipette!º Pipette, my precious one!
— Now we're gettin it.º Hello!
— Hellohello! Ballymacarett! Am I thru, miss?º
— Now,º just permit me a moment.º Are you there? Hello. Sybil Head here. Yes. Very good now. Do you remember |3the midsummer |aa midsummer the midsummera|3| nightº following |3a |athe aa| crying3| fair day?ºº
— You may say they were.
— Were they bonfires?
— No other name would at all befit them unless that. Bonafieries! With their blue beards streaming to the heavens.
— Was it a high white night now?
— Was there rain by any chance?
— There fell some fall of snow as well,º I gather.
— Out of all jokes it did.
— Sure she was
— Indeed then I do.º
— Is it Woful Dane Bottom?
— There used. And the crandest maypole tree in all the world. Father and mother of a plant!º
— How grand is this giant? Tell us what you know about the plant.
— There'sº queensmaids and iris treegirls growing upon her and Tyburn fenians snoring in his boleº
|3and crossbones strewing its holy floorº3| andº culprits of Erasmus Smith's boys climbing to her crock and the Kilmainham
pensioners chucking farthings up to her to fall her cranberries and cock robins hatching out his mistletoe eggs for him, the sun and moon pegging honeysuckle and white
heather down, creatures of the wild approaching him for to claw and rub,º hermits of the desert barking their shins over her infernal roots and his acorns flying wild onº all sides out of him after the birds of the air and her leaves sinsinsinning since the night of time andº each and all of their branches meeting and shaking twisty hands once more all over again in the new world.
— I consider I would be frightfully ashamed if I was.
— He is a man of around fifty who does messagesº.º Have you ever heard of this Doyle who belongs to Kimmage being most of his time down at the Green Man and mixing with the public going for groceries always when he would be finished his tea?º
— As mad as the brambles he is. Touch him.
— I am sorry to have to tell you they were coming down from off him.
— You are sure it was not a wake you were at?
— Happily you were not quite so successful in sublimating your suppressions?º
— Quite so.º
— Ah, go on with you now!
— Faith,º then, firstº he come up and wanted his calico back. Then counting as many as thirty secondsº like I said he kept cursing at him the way he was robbed to know who burned the hay which the man knewº nothing about.
|3— That would be about 11.30.
— Would it?3|
— I will if so it's the will of God.
|3⇑<—3| |3D'yu mean to tall us on your oath, my lad, yur moon
— And this pootsch went on night after night according to you. For years and years perhaps?
— That's right.
— D'yu mean to tall us on yurº oath, my lad,º yur moon was shining and wind blowing night after night,º for years and years perhaps,º after yuº swearing to it a while back the other way about that there was rain in plenty all the time?
— Perhaps so, as you affirm. I never thought about it, faith. However.....
— Ay.º I firmly swear to it that it was.
— Yes, by the way.º When?
|3— How would you like to hear your right name now|a, johnny,a| if yer not freckened of frank comment?
— Let me once more. Now my other point. Did you know
that one of these two, the man with the fender, or the coffin, if you prefer that, was accused of a certain offence or of a choice of two offences,º if you like itº better that way? Did you now? You did, you rogue,º you?º
— You hear things. |3Besides bushes have eyes, don't forget.3|
— It all depends on what you mean by your family.
— Me and Friskyº Shorty and a few plebiscites was just arguing friendly like overº the old
partyº. What me and Frisky wants to know is thisahere. Supposing him to have taken his epicene licence respectively as regards them male privates and or concomitantly with all
common or neuter respects to them
publicº females as was very properly detained by the metropolitan in connection with this regrettable nuisance,º being in strict contravention of schedule in board of forests and works byelaws regulationing amusements section of our beloved park in pursuance me and Shortyº have approached a reverend gentlemanº of the name of Mr Coppinger with reference to a piece of fire fittings as was most obliging in this matter of his explanations given to me and Shorty,º touching what the good book says concerning the merits of early bisexualism besides him citing exampleº given by a valued friend of the Reverend Mr Coppinger of the name of Mr J. P. Cockshott as owns a pretty maisonette fronting on to the South bluffs as was telling us how Mr Cockshott he tells him,º the reverend Mr Coppinger,º as howº he reckoned up to seven mile of a school of herringº passingº |3the3| Bloater Naze from twelve and him ariding himº by the silent hour. And,º reverend, he says, gut me,º but them herringº was asº gladful as kippers could wellº be considering, flipping their little coppingers, pot em, the fresh little flirties, the dirty little gillybrighteners, pickle their spratties, the little smolty gallockers, and, reverend, says he, them little salty populators, says he, as sure as my eggs is on cockshot entre nous, all them little upanddowndippiesº they was all of a wriggolo doodah in testimonial to their early bisexualism.
— Gubbernathor!º And he was nothing short of one! Spawning all over the seven parishes!
— Lift it now, Hosty! Hump's your mark!
Our human conger eel!
— Never a fear but they'll
land him yet, Slitheryscalesº on liffeybank, times and times and a half aº time with a pillow of sand to polster him.
Doº you say they will? Iº bet you they will.º Amongº the shivering sedges so? Weedywaving.º Orº tulipbeds of Rush below.º
— Eh, tell us and God bless you were they Coldstream guards or how many were they seen him?
— Ah, God, and sure I thought it was larking with two fine young girls that time.º I was given to understand there was that one that was mad gone on him. Sure she was near drowned in admiration for herself,º making faces at her |3crystal3| likeness in the brook after, all tossedº as she was.
— Listen, meme dearest. Of course I know you are a very wicked girl. Still,º you do look lovely! Myº, you do! Listen, meme sweety! It's only us two. Of course it was downright wicked of him, really it was. Still,º me and you willº make it up so as nobody, of course, needº ever know. So,º meme mearestº, be free to me!º And,º listen, youyouº beauty, I'll be true to you.
— Yerº crackling out of yerº turn, my Moonster friend.º Answer myº queskins first, johnny. Ye've as
much cheek on you now as would boil a cauldron ofº
|3kale kalebrose3|. Did the food inspector fine more than sixteen per cent of chalk in the purity flour of this raw materialist? We young chaps are here to know had the two generals,º who have been getting nosemoneyº cheap and stirring up the public opinion with their legs, had they their service books in order and duly signed when discharged from their last situations? Will ye gup and tell the board how did Magrath or MacMonaghan come into awful position of the barrel of bellywash? And why,º is it any harm to ask,º was this man in the coombe carrying his ark across his back when he might have been settinº inside of her? Where were the doughboys,º three in number, directing their steps according to the liaison officer,º with their trenchcoats open and their hands in their pocketsº contrary
to military rules,º when confronted with his obstruction? Is it an actual fact that this nordic in child's kilts is co-ownerº of a hengster's circus near North Great Denmark Street and that he hasº been complaining to the police barracks and applying for an order of certiorariº andº crying about him being molested by offers of vacancies from females in this cityº neighing after the man ever since they seen his lifesize picture in the sheets? Was it him that suborned a deafmute sonº of his to gout in his bare feet and buy the usual jar of porter and set it down before the wife with her fireman's helmet on her, bidding her mine the house, the strumpet, while him and his lagan loves were rampaging the roads?º Where's that auxiliary officer that reported on the whole hoodlum,º relying on his |3Morse morse-erse3| wordybook? Recall |3Sackerson Sickerson3|! Sackerson!º